Any game with only one save file is dumb...

Any game with only one save file is dumb…

Yes, you read that correctly – dumb. Incredibly dumb even. How any developer could possibly think that this is a good practice when making games needs to go back to school. Not grad school or college, I’m talking kindergarten. It’s clearly obvious that they missed some part of their education so let’s start back from the beginning just to be safe.

Do you know what I love about videogames? COMPLETING THEM!

Sure story and gameplay are important, but none of that would matter if the game doesn’t have clear goals and an ending. If I want shit to not end, I’d either play a sports game, multiplayer-death match-fps stuff, an MMO, Forza (cause holy shit, has anyone finished one of those?) or Tetris. Know why I don’t play Tetris? Because it sucks. True story. Tetris was awesome on the original Gameboy because it gave me something to do in the bathroom – and I was little and less awesome.

I thought that Just Cause 3 was a great game. It had everything I love – a story (barely) tons of stuff to do (driving, gliding, shooting, blowing stuff the hell up, stealing cars, stealing cars then running people over, effing mines that act like rockets before blowing up, putting those mines on people’s faces and straight up blasting them across the map before they blow up, goats that you can drop kick, etc.) Seriously, I could write a novel based on all the cool stuff you can do in this game. That was until tonight.

Yes, I did say drop kicking goats

Tonight, someone accidentally selected the start new game button. Who would do such a thing?None of your goddam business, it doesn’t matter, it wasn’t me by mistake….it was me. Regardless, many games have options like these: New Game or Continue/load/resume/etc. Select New Game and you know what happens? You guessed it, a new game starts. Select any of the “continue a saved game” options and you get to? Yes, that’s right, continue a game where you left off. See how easy that is. One could say that it makes sense. Hell, it makes so much sense that one could also say it’s common sense. Honestly, this has been a staple of games since before they even had battery back-up (passcodes kinda sucked, but at least you got one for each level) Some games even allow a near infinite number of saves, I think my Fallout 4 save data has over 100, yes I save a lot, it’s the effing post apocalypse. Lose an hour of progress to a deathclaw and tell me a save too much – yea, that’s right. Anyways, what I’m saying is that you can reasonably assume that if you’re playing a game with a story, that you can save a game, start a new one, do whatever and all your progress is there to reload from a collection of files.

UNLESS you’re playing one of the few games that allow only one save. You know what happens in these – when you select New Game it straight up pisses on your saved game data, then shit flushes it down into the depths of hell. Seriously, I know it’s tough to believe that in the age of cloud saves and essentially unlimited console HDD space that a game would only have one save.

Well, Just Cause 3 is one such game and all my progress – gone. All the stuff I blew up – unblown up. The small countries worth of goons I’ve killed – brought back to life. The goats I’ve drop kicked – yep you’ve guessed it, un-drop kicked. Not to mention the plethora of collectibles, and challenges I’ve completed – well over 40 hours or so…

GONE.

ALL OF IT.

GONE.

Just Cause 3 just took a big, runny, steamy, corn-filled dump on all the time I spent enjoying it.

It happened because its creators gave it one save file. One save games are stupid. Not Tetris stupid, but stupid.

I’m not playing through this again. Sorry fictional, quasi-Mexican-ish, country. I’ll never liberate you. Your people shall forever remain oppressed. The bad guys have won.